The new year is well upon us as the gloomy days of January quickly pass. Well, in California's case, the 80 degree days haven't been so gloomy (thank you climate change). All this means that my two - month long winter break has finally ended.
Today was my first day of classes for the second semester. Once again sitting at home on my computer, it doesn't feel real. However, my hopes for this semester are high. All at once, I feel immense confusion about where I am at and what I want mixed with a deep feeling of peace that I will figure it out.
I want to get involved in so many things, and each feels like it could greatly alter my life and my path. Do I apply for The Daily Trojan or a lifestyle magazine? Do I join a service organization or add another 2 - unit class? I want to do it all. I put too much pressure on each decision and want to just trust my gut.
But what does that even mean?
Trust.
Trust is my word of intention for 2021. I vow to trust myself and not look back on what cannot be changed. I vow to trust that I am strong enough to push through the challenges I have been facing. I vow to trust my worth as a person. I vow to trust the goodness of the world, and surround myself with the people who spread it. I vow to trust that somehow it will all make sense.
In the words of Rob Thomas,
"And maybe someday we'll figure all this out
Try to put an end to all our doubt
Try to find a way to make things better now that
Maybe someday we'll live our lives out loud
We'll be better off somehow, someday"
As I make my way through the doubts of this semester, I will remember this song and to trust myself. Who knows where I will be in the next few months? Hopefully in LA, but also hopefully at ease. I hope to feel confident in the work I am producing, the friends I am making, and the authenticity I am presenting.
Whether you are starting a new semester, a new job, or just embracing the new year, allow yourself an open mind for the growth that is coming. Change is coming. Every day is a new chance to start over.
Fight on.
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